As the world continues to embroil itself further and deeper in this pandemic, disrupting the global economy and changing our ways of life, perhaps for a long time to come, it is important to step back and reflect on some of the positive influences that this crisis has brought to our daily lives. This is not to make light of the pain and suffering that it has brought upon humanity and will continue to bring us for the foreseeable future. Yet, for many of us, who have been fortunate enough to avoid the immediate devastation of this global health crisis, we may find some succor as we count our blessings. Here are some positive outcomes for me so far:
First, this ongoing crisis has brought me closer to own immediate family.
I’ll admit this is a double-edged sword, since I’m separated from my wife, who remains in China, while I remain here in the USA with my two daughters. But first and foremost, the past two months have enabled me to spend more time with my daughters than I have in years. This is particular to my work situation, since I live and work in a different city (Kunshan, China), to where my family lives (Shanghai). For the past five years, I’ve been a “weekend dad”, spending time with my family in Shanghai on weekends while working in Kunshan on weekdays.
Yet for the past two months, I’ve been more of a 24/7 dad, taking care of my daughters’ needs through several periods of quarantine, overseeing their online learning, making sure they are well fed, doing their laundry, and making sure they keep to a regular schedule, which for two teenage/tweenage daughters is not so easy. I’ve also been able to talk with them more and share my concerns with them, while also learning more about them and their interests, as they continue to grow and learn through these difficult times.
Second, I’ve been able to spend quality time with my family here in the USA.
Again, this is somewhat particular to my life situation, having spent much of my adult life living abroad. After our 14-day self-quarantine in February, we spent a few days with my aunt and uncle in Berkeley, California, and for the past month I’ve been living with my mother and stepfather in my hometown of Acton, Massachusetts. Now it appears that we will be together for some time to come. While I was hoping to return to China with my daughters, that opportunity has disappeared for now, since on March 28, owing to the growing global pandemic and fears of a second wave in China, China closes its doors to non-Chinese nationals. This has been disappointing for us, but on the other hand, I’m glad to be here in my home country and hometown, helping my own parents to cope with the situation.
Third, I’ve been able to spend more time with nature.
Surrounding our home in Acton and in neighboring towns such as Concord, there are large forested areas, conservation lands with trails and pathways, which enable us to practice physical distancing with others while also enjoying the great outdoors. Even in our own neighborhood we can enjoy daily walks along the streets, while watching the spring unfold. We can hear the birdcalls and watch the trees unfurl their leaves, fruits, and flowers. And we can wave to friendly neighbors, all of whom are out there exercising and enjoying the early spring weather, while practicing physical distancing.
While Shanghai and Kunshan have their own share of parks and gardens, I haven’t spent this much time in a natural environment in years. Acton has a beautiful combination of being a small colonial town and having plenty of rural and forested areas, plus countless ponds and streams. This brings me back to my idyllic childhood years, when my friends and I used to roam and ramble around the town, camping out on starlit nights, fishing in the local streams and ponds, or cycling our way around the different towns of Eastern Massachusetts. Since then, I’ve spent most of my adult life living in large cities, from New York, to Sydney, Taipei, Beijing, Shanghai, and Seoul. I’ve spent most of those years cramped in dense urban apartments, taking public transportation or driving my car in dense traffic for hours each week. It’s nice to be back for a spell in my old hometown and to reconnect with the natural world in a deeper way. Walking is now my main mode of transport, and in this way, my new year’s resolution of 2020 was unexpectedly fulfilled.
Fourth, I’m connecting with old friends again after all these years.
In a crisis such as this one, you really get to learn who your deepest friends are, because you connect and talk to and ask about each other. In our “normal” stream of life, we spend a lot of time with our colleagues, and in my case, with students and other transient people in our lives. No matter how dear they may seem at the moment, these folks come and go in our lives. But when our futures are called into question, we tend to reach out to the most cherished people in our lives, some of whom we may have neglected over the years. And all the technology that’s helping us to continue to work and teach is also helping us to connect back to old friends and rekindle friendships that lay dormant for many years.
While I certainly wouldn’t have wanted things to happen this way, I need to appreciate some of the good things that living in an age of crisis has brought to me, and probably to countless other people around the globe.
The Chinese have a saying, “The old man lost his horse—maybe it’s a good thing” 塞翁失马焉知非福, and with so many other sayings that have come down to us over the ages, this one is full of wisdom and hope.